No More Seasoning!
Easily the funniest story I read today. Pappy’s Seasoning, not just a tasty dry rub for meats, also a tasty dry rub for the victims of the house you’re robbing. No I’m not kidding. Here’s proof from fresnobee.com.
Here’s the jist of the story; the burglar broke in ransacked the house of two farmworkers, from the kitchen he grabbed a bottle of Pappy’s Seasoning and began applying it to one of the two men while he slept. He then used an 8 inch sausage link and slapped the other man in the face and head repeatedly with it. This woke both men up. The suspect then fled the house in his t-shirt, boxers and socks leaving his pants and wallet behind. Clearly not a well seasoned burglar. (HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! Get it? Get it?!)The suspect was hiding in a nearby field where police found and arrested him. The seasoning was recovered. Unfortunately the sausage was dropped and eaten by a dog.
Lt. Ian Burrimond of the Fresno Sheriff’s Department said deputies “had no trouble linking the suspect to the crime”. HAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!!! Get it?! LINKING?? Sausage?! ….hello?)
Alright, I’m done.
